Plan To Have A Long Lasting Relationship, And It Just Might Happen



Just like many, we are often carried away when we see older couples who have spent thirty, forty years together, we wonder if like boyfriends and girlfriends they had no issues that should have separated them and the truth is, they did- so what kept them together we ask?


Relationships begin when we admire someone, it sticks when we admire the good about that person and it grows when we never stop admiring that person. Staying together takes work, it takes commitment and it takes more than a book, a therapist or even an article would advice you.


When we seek someone to be involved with, consciously or not, we go on a hunt for love. Every one regardless of what they have or feel, has a need to be loved and that is what a relationship is all about, we all have pain and we all want to heal from them.


Relationships are usually between two people, they are usually about two individuals who find fun staying together; the fun doesn’t always stay with them and sometimes both parties don’t want that fun at the same time but of cos, it doesn’t mean they don’t want each other.


We often look for the good relationship, we think the couples who quarrel out loud have the worse relationship and the ones we see peck and cuddle have the best relationships, we think a silent woman is a mature woman and a silent man with a troublesome woman is the best she could ever have but the truth is, neither of those relationships are good or bad- they are just what they are.Image


Many religious teachings advice people about relationships, they advice that getting God involved through prayers and fasting helps a relationship grow. They place important on religious beliefs which in turn through their advice say when things fall apart could keep things together.


Praying and fasting together for your relationship might seem too religious at times but praying for those you love isn’t religion, its love. Its compassion and less ego because believe it or not, it helps both parties to handle issues that go beyond them because in all reality, a relationship/marriage is more than a talk or love making.


Praying for your spouse can help you see things and yes sometimes people could have dreams and see visions that could tell them things about their partners and even fears their partners refuse to share- although dreams doesn’t always happen for everyone and this is because, not everyone has a dream.  You don’t have to base your judgments on dreams that have no confirmation anyway. Remember, not everyone believes in a supreme being, a dream or the same strong believe in what you do.


In relationships/marriages, issues will always rise, egos would always run wide and  each time you think, one more thing would make things work, those things may never make you work because we can never have it all, something always goes wrong or goes missing.


People come together for love, they create time and grow hoping to never fall apart. They quarrel and get along and sometimes, they realize their wrongs and better ways to treat each other. We all find someone to fill a void and sometimes we forget to fill ourselves with what we really want.


When in a relationship, we love, we care, we quarrel, we nag, we make up, sometimes those quarrels don’t often come because one’s partner has gotten it all wrong. We are human and people have a lot more challenges going on sometimes.


People have temperaments, some like to remain jovial, some people can be controlling and authoritative, some can be accommodating and some can be quiet. Sometimes the characters we have may affect our relationship and sometimes it could go the other way. The truth is, no matter what character your partner has, your character could also do something for them- we ain’t all perfect and because you have a partner with a different temperament, doesn’t make you any better. It is important not to let the battles/issues  people have stop us from loving them.


As a man, it would be nice for you to pray with your partner, as a woman, you could pray for them. You could pray for their emotions on handling general issues against them and you two, you could pray for their characters, you could pray for the love you share and the love you hope will last,  you could even pray for fears un shared hoping for a change which we all know must come from the inside out.


There would always be great battles that would tear you apart, people are often known to blame the weaker partner, trust issues would arise and so on and so forth. Couples who go through the trust issue are usually advised to speak to each other about it, except of cause, both parties prefer a separation.


Loving someone comes with understanding, it comes with appreciation- if a blind man can tell a lady that she smells good, why can’t you tell your woman/man that they look good? Why can’t you find a way to express your words to your partner? Do you not know that love can make one become better the other?


Your partner might have trust issues, they could have a low self esteem, they could even be a quiet, sad, lonely person but sometimes what you see in your partner matters- no two sad, quarrelsome individuals make sense- If ever you ever felt love for your partner, pray for them, pray for yourself because you also need to grow by yourself and with your partner. Find ways to speak to each other, find ways to talk about issues that not just affect your relationship but issues that affect them personally- we all face a battle even when we are with others.


You are together because you want to be- stop looking for an easy way out in a relationship/marriage. Stop wanting a separation or a divorce- its not how many partners you have but how many changes you make in your partner. Looking to someone else to say you’re ok, isn’t all that nice.



ImageStaying together takes faith, it takes more than a year and it means more than words can express. It is the difference you give to your partner, in relation to friends, admirers and so on that matters. Every person can give you what you want if you let them know what you want- appreciate what you have and see it produce what you need.


God always gives us someone who has the strength we need when we are weak.

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